Thoughts

I’ve been thinking a lot recently. Therapy really is bringing things to the surface that i’ve blocked out. But today i got thinking of my parents. Why do they ignore my mental health? Why don’t they want to help me? Why don’t they reach out and ask how i am? Why don’t they reply back when i give them a window of opportunity after mentioning something regarding my mental health before them quickly changing the subject? Why at 9 and 13 years old was my letter of depressive feelings ignored and not acknowledged? 

I no longe get down at the fact they dont make effort or show to care. She also isn’t a trigger to me anymore. I keep my distance and only visit for the kids and have accepted it is what it is. They are who they are because of what they went through growing up. They didn’t want to change what they went through to make it better for us kids, they let it damage us, i let it damage me. 

But i wont anymore. My children need me to be my best. So that i sha’ll try and be 😊

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